hownowbrownseacow: rosiebeck: nxv: primisthebomb: I THREW A GRAPE IN THE AIR TO CATCH IT IN MY MOUTH BUT IT WENT TOO HIGH AND HIT THE CEILING AND THERE WAS A SPIDER THERE AND THE SPIDER FELL AND SO DID THE GRAPE AND THEY BOTH LANDED ON MY FACE AND I STILL HAVEN’T STOPPED SCREAMING i read the first line in my head in the tune of call me maybe im so stupid I threw a grape in the air I...
a-sexy-cat: actually taking time to do your hair and making it all nice then walking outside and
epic-humor: samandriel: I bet Spiderman left New York City for a day trip and when he came back, he saw the catastrophic aftermath of The Avengers and he was like “I WAS GONE FOR ONE DAY. ONE DAY.”
i hate when applications are like “why do you want to work here” because i need money what do you want me to say omfg I HAVE A PASSION FOR FROZEN YOGURT
Do you do marathons?
fuckyeahlaughters: Me: Yes, all the time, which show?
treatsandsuch: when you overhear your name in a conversation
roaminromans: how to play a racing game HIT EVERYONE OUT OF THE WAY GO FAST NEVER USE BRAKES
commanderinqueef: *cracks knuckles* *opens microsoft word* *takes 30 min break*
Surprisingly, perfectionists are often procrastinators, as they can tend to think “I don’t have the right skills or resources to do this perfectly now, so I won’t do it at all.”
leonardo-dicaprisun: you know you’re really lazy when you get excited about cancelled plans.
excalilbur: finnemoron: what if the whole “mirror mirror on the wall who’s the fairest of them all” thing was created so that little girls would do it in the mirror and when their reflection didn’t change they’d see how beautiful they are that is the most beautiful thing i have read all week
*runs for 10 minutes*
me: am i skinny yet?
Ladies & Gentlemen, let me introduce you my...
timelords-sherlock-andmusic: internetexplorers: sasstielspn: internetexplorers: imagine if we cried from our fingers instead of our eyes what is this site idk im pretty sure this is tumblr and suddenly we’re all waterbenders
scraggay: boys that look good with both beards and no beards are the most lethal kinds of boys
shiphassailed: when your internet isnt really working well and your whole dash is just blank squares and you still scroll through it attentively
exitmusicforafilmm: crypticrose: c-aramelize: bur-gund-y: c-aramelize: living-afairytale: c-aramelize: so oxygen went on a date with potassium today…it went ok. i thought oxygen was dating magnesium…omg actually oxygen first asked nitrogen out, but nitrogen was all like “NO” I thought oxygen had that double bond with the hydrogen twins looks like someone’s a HO ...
tavrosofnitram: “let me like that post so i can look at it again sometime!”
mycroft: an update that requires me to restart my computer is an update that is never getting installed.